Sugar Tarts

Maybe it's because I'm sick
But my whole body is messed up at the moment
Not reacting to anything the way I think
Instead becoming more sick
And less interested.

Emotions are no different
Spiking very quickly
Over something small
Yet this time I can contain them
So it's getting there.


Time to take a trip.
A few today actually.
But this one is to bring back some family
They've been in America
And are due back at the airport in awhile.
So I must toodle over to get them!


So
Long
Everybody.
(toodleoo)


x

Drummer Jokes

This is ridiculous.
There is definitely something wrong with me.
Who knows what
But I haven't eaten all day
Apart from a couple of mouthfuls of less-than-Fantastic Noodles
And everything just makes me want to cry.
What?

At least I managed to get rid of the panic from the other day
But seriously
What is going on?!

Perhaps I should fix it.

Um..
er..
mouth.

x

Fab Feb

I have to tread carefully
But everything is well.There was a patch of very thin ice

But seemingly
It has all fallen nicely into place.

It's a nice feeling.
Loose ends are being tied
Rachel, Stace and I went to the house yesterday
So everything there is as it should be.
Friendships remain as they should be
And I still feel good about it.
The only thing not so great is my bank account.
I am owed about $2700 from a couple of different sources
One of which is work
Their lack of attention in paying my salary is disconcerting
And further reduces my motivation to actually do any work
I suppose now at least I have an excuse for doing nothing.

Also just now I seemed to be reliving a certain panic feeling which I so loathe
It hasn't happened for weeks
And it has no reason to reappear.
It was momentary, however
And hopefully a once-off.

I think I just have to reassure myself.
I have (something non-descript like) 22 days
To prepare for uni
And sort out things at home like my bookshelf
And the Valedictory DVD.
Hopefully these things will keep me busy.

I'm sure they will.
I also need a Firewire cable
I learned the other day that in order to use iMovie
One needs Firewire.
My camera has it
I just don't have the cable.
Oh well.

Twenty two days.
Bring it on,
I can't wait.

Rock
Your
World.

x

On The Verge

It's been a little over a week since my last blog

For the most part it's been much of the same

Which is certainly not a bad thing.

Driving all over the countryside

Sydney, Melbourne, Phillip Island

Friends, family, food, tennis

Spiders, one after the other

But also

Amazing feelings

One after the other

Unfortunately this week yielded some unsatisfactory outcomes

And to those in pain

My thoughts are with you.

Apologies also

Because I do not wish to dwell

But to focus on all the things that made me happy.

I've said this already

And I'll say it again

I have never felt so loved

By so many people.

Expressions of love

So beautiful

So captivating

Certainly moments I'll treasure.

It seemed to go so fast

But every moment was worth it.

Every word

Every touch

Every breath.

Smiles

Laughter

Tears

Embrace.

Farewell

But not forgotten.

Not by a long shot.

I

Love

You.

x

Bombs Away

Not gonna lie.
This has been
The best week
Of the year
Of my life.

If my heart was a compass
You'd be North

I have officially been
On the rollercoaster downhill
For seven days.

I would not trade this for the world.
Everything is so easy
So amazing
So balanced
So well fitting.

When you and I are alone
I've never felt so at home

Where to from here?
Hard to say
But I know
I am happy.

I
Love
You.

x

Shudder

That's what you get

For waking up in Vegas.

I am tired

Not tired enough to fall straight asleep though

Here's a fun story.

Today we trekked through the 41 degree heat

To the city

To Melbourne Central

We had a lovely fun shopping expedition

I bought a wicked calendar

Featuring wolves.

Then we left

And went swimming.

Very un-detailed, I know

But as I said

I am tired.

I hear snoring

This is why I sleep with the door closed.

But tonight I cannot

It is presently 32 degrees

Apparently, anyway.

And yes, it is nearly 2am.

Yuck.

Speaking of which

It is nearly 2.12

(well, in almost half an hour)

After that,

It will only be three 2:12's..

Very exciting.

Yawns

They are coming.

Perhaps I should make with the sleeping.

Or try, at least.

Pocketful

Of

Sunshine.

x

47FZKY

Not gonna lie

This needs to be said.

I am in love.

Or so I believe

The reason I think so?
I have never

ever

felt this way.

Not once.

It drives me insane

Yet it feels worthwhile.

It makes me so upset

Yet so happy.

It is such a rollercoaster

One hell of a ride

At the moment

It's on a boring up-hill

I'm just waiting

For the next

Wicked downward spiral

Quick corners

And a reason to cheer.

It's coming.

I know it is.

I just have to be patient

And hope that it works

The way I want it to.

I do think it's weird

How generally speaking

A 'downhill' is bad

But on a rollercoaster

It's the best part.

I need some more

Rollercoaster downhills.

I guess that means

More real up-hills

But on the same token

Going up hill is harder.

Does any of this make sense?

Aha, the irony.

None of it does.

None of these feelings.

None of my musings.

Do I care?

No.

Why?

Because

I

Am

In

Love.

x